You know what I hate? People who log support calls without any description of the problem. Example: I get a call from someone who says ‘Our printer isn’t working.’ That’s it.

Apparently I am supposed to be able to tell the cause of the problem and the necessary steps to fix it simply by being notified of the problem’s existence. If this was the case, I would be either in government and the world would be a utopia, or I would be filthy stinking rich and would thus not be answering your support calls.

I hate their stinking insistence that computers are just too hard and so they shouldn’t bother to make the inference that because the support centre always asks them to reboot, they should try rebooting their PC before calling, instead of just complaining about the support centre not earning their pay because they always just say ‘reboot first’. Chances are pretty good the support centre is, instead, either dealing with other people’s idiotic queries or problems or are instead busy suppressing the urge to buy a large number of automatic weapons and fix the user problem once an for all.

I have a dream. One day, standard equipment for support staff will be an electric cattle prod, and they will be encouraged to use it on people who waste their time. And they will have a duty to use it on people who not only waste their time with their rampant stupidity, but then have the hide and the audacity to complain about how long it took to get to them.

I’m having a shit day, in case you hadn’t guessed.